Take this blog and shove it!

Take this blog and shove it,
I ain't bloggin' here no more.
My mind done left,
An' took all the reasons I was bloggin' for.
You better not to try to stand in my way,
As I'm a typin' out the door.
Take this blog and shove it,
I ain't bloggin' here no more.

I've been bloggin' on this puter’,
For nigh on two years.
All this time, I watched my mind,
Drownin' in a pool of beers.
An I've seen a lot of my brain cells die,
One of these days, I'm gonna blow my top!
Man, I can't wait to see their faces,
When I get the nerve to say:

Take this blog and shove it,
I ain't bloggin' here no more.
My mind done left,
An' took all the reasons I was bloggin' for.
You better not to try to stand in my way,
As I'm a typin' out the door.
Take this blog and shove it,
I ain't bloggin' here no more.


Take this blog and shove it.



Thanks to all my viewers. This site is now defunct. I have retired OFM. To you writers out there, keep up the bloggging, as I am NOT retired from reading....just writing.

Superfadedness Management Rule #91

SFM Rule #91 - Waking up in Foreign Territory

Have you ever been out practicing you Fadedness Mgmt. and woken up in a place you didn't recognize? This is the rule that covers that very situation. Most of the basis for this rule has been researched through buddies of mine, one who has mastered the art of SFM and one who is still a "grasshopper". I will give three examples with the guidelines to follow.


Situation A: Waking up on a couch, with wet pants. Not having any idea of where you are at. What do you do? 1st inclination should be to GET OUT NOW. Worry about your pants at a later time, escape is your first concern.

What did my friend do you ask? He proceeded to find a phone and call the people he was with the night before, setting up a ride for himself. While a ride is important, you can worry about that later, remember - ESCAPE is key in a situation where you may have ruined someone's white, leather couch. Nevermind who he is.

Situation B: Same buddy, new foreign territory. This time he woke up on a couch covered in a blankie (no wet pants). He did follow the first guideline, assess the situation. Use all of your senses (sight, smell, touch, hearing, taste?, and the SFM force). Before you freak, you should know just exactly what is happening.

Upon realizing where he was, because we had surveyed this home before because there were 2 hot girls living there, he failed the second guideline - don't panic. He started to freak and followed another rule, go for the door. Upon reaching the door, he saw his shoes neatly lined up next to it, grabbing them and then pulling on the door (which didn't open due to a strategically placed towel), he freaked a little more. He then bolted through the house to the side door and ran home pulling his shirt up over his head as if that was a disguise. We only lived 2 houses away! Best part was when he got home, his car was running and the doors were locked.

Situation C: This buddy is the real start-up of SFM, he is a master. Upon realizing that he had been at a party where he didn't know the host. He calmly assessed that he needed to leave. Only one problem, someone had stolen his shoestring, only on one foot. Needing his Vans to carry him to his dorm, he proceeded to the kitchen to find a replacement. Luck was his when he found a packet of bread ties. After wiring up his shoe, he was out the door, again assessing where he was so he could journey in the correct direction.


So, what are the guideline you say....
1> Assess the situation - where are you, why are you there, do you know where you are? (use all of your senses)
2> What do you need to do? Escape is most likely unless you realize that you know where you are, which sometimes happens.
3> Act upon your assessments. Leaving is usually the key, unless you have stayed calm enough to do otherwise.
4> Relax, freaking out will only magnify the situation. Staying calm will allow you to move faster than a crazed sprint.

These guideline must be followed again when you get out of the house, apartment, dorm etc.

There you have it folks, Rule #91 - Waking in foreign territory.

But Not Out!

Blogged Down = Bogged Down = Too damn busy


For the few faithful and the even fewer random viewers, I will attempt to spit something out.

I thought about posting that I was quiting the "blogging business" for an april fools joke but thought after my recent hiatus that most of you would believe it and never return.

I don't have much to say. I have been busy with my work, especially the new coaching gig I have. I am the Girls Varsity Track Coach and since I love track my mind is mostly on that.

I am entering my busiest time of the year, both at school and on weekends. I have a Volleyball clinic this weekend, weddings the next two, then I have some track stuff.

I will attempt to add a new chapter of SFM later today or Sunday.

Until then.....

Peace...and Chicken Grease (as my buddy Giese used to say)