NoCrack $.99 1/2 oz

I had to go the pharmacy last night and observed a sign that I wanted to photograph to show you all, but I am a pour ( I realize this is for liquid, but that's they way I pronounce poor) bastard who cannot afford to buy a camera phone. It said NoCrack $.99 1/2oz. So I thought what the hell is NoCrack? Here is my thought process:

1> Something for Crack addicts? Like Methadone or the nicotine patch? But I couldn't imagine a pharmacy in small town Iowa advertising a product for crack addicts.

2> Something for plumbers? Then I looked closer and saw the 1/2oz and figured this could not be. 1/2oz is not near enough to fill a plumbers crack.

3> Birth control? Do I really need to go down this road...

4> Must be lip balm. Although they may need to signify this to the wandering minded like myself.

On a side note, there is nothing like feeling like a criminal as you give your life story to the phamacist so you can buy cold medicine. It was also similar to visiting your dealer as he gets the "goods" you ask for. How strange.

Thanks

Even though I most likely will be online at some point this weekend, I most likely will not post anything. I guess it's not really a weekend to most. I will be off work today at 2:30 and will not have to return until Monday. Being a teacher has it's perks, although just a few of them.

So, Have a Merry Thanksgiving!

Thanks for reading.

Whole Lotta Generation Gap Goin' On.....

For those of you who don't know me personally, I married a younger woman. She is 6 years my junior. Although I wasn't interested in her at the time, I was her Junior High and High School disc jockey pretty much all through her educational tour at OCSD. We found it pretty strange that I had graduated college before she exited HS, even though on many occasions you wouldn't be able to tell, I am a bit immature if you haven't figured out yet.

So anyway, in getting to my point of this post: The other night while watching the Johnny Cash special (which was rather weak I might add, only a couple of good performances), Jerry Lee Lewis was performing. My wife, being the beautiful young thing that she is, said, "Doesn't he have a disease or something?" I said, "Maybe alcoholism at one time." I wasn't really thinking about what she was asking until...."Doesn't he do a benifit for kids or something?" WOW. Great Balls of Muscular Dystrophy! "That's Jerry Lewis as in Martin and Lewis, not Jerry Lee." I think she felt a little embarrased, she seems to think she is smarter than me most of the time. So I held back a little during my explanation.

All aboard! Hah hah hah..

Back in college I had a friend who had always wanted to jump on a slow moving train and ride it until it stopped, or to just jump on and take it to the next town. I thought he was crazy, who knows how long you may have to ride.

Well, this past week a kid at my school did just that. He hopped on a slow moving train in town (A) and rode to his destination, town (B). The problem being, the train doesn't slow down in town (B), it keeps crusing @ speeds upwards of 60MPH. Soooooo, being the quick thinker he was, he decided it was best if he jumped ship so-to-speak.

Upon leaping off of the swiftly moving train, he landed in a pile of rail-road ties. This was not so soft. He is OK though. Some bruises and a bum shoulder (no pun intended), and a nice goose-egg on his melon, complete with sutures, 30 I think. No one saw him, and he said no one bothered to stop him as he walked across town, bloodied like...like...like he had just jumped off a train!

Apparently he did not have a ride home, and thought the train option was his best. Well, even if it wasn't his best option, it does merit the best story to retell.

"Mental wounds still screamingDriving me insaneI'm going off the rails on a crazy train"

White Trash Choir

I made a social science realization at a Vet's Assembly we had in school. So, as we are sitting there and listening to the choir I noticed that many of the girls that go out for choir are what some might call "trouble". You know, the girls that drink beer, smoke cig's and date the guys that are out of school already. Not that I disapprove of any of that, I just don't know of any other way to describe them.

My next question in my head was; "Why?" Is there a reason beyond the fact that they might just like singing? Easy class maybe? Anyone out in the blogosphere have any ideas?

I had to think back to all of my school experiences to see if this was a coincidence or, if in fact, all schools experience the same phenomenon. I also realize that not all of the girls out for choir are the "bad" girls. As I thought this over, I came to the conclusion that this is true in all schools, or at least all schools that I had been a part of or witnessed.

The Llama and his music...

Stimpy over at Llama Herding 101 got me thinking a bit, so I had to comment. Here is his post: Music

Here is my list, although I kinda feel like I am picking a favorites list. It is difficult to separate the two mentally in my skull. I also cannot list them in any order, so this is a group of five rather than a list of top five, similar to Stimp's.

* R.E.M. "Green" - also the 1st concert I had ever been to. I was a college radio dork. INXS, Sig Sig Sputnik, Dead Milkmen, Dead Kennedy's, Chili Peppers (before they were cool), D.R.I., Violent Femmes, etc. etc.

* Tool "Undertow" - Powerful, deep, soulful, rock metal music. Another good concert, it was a religious experience if I may comment so.

* 311 "Music" - Reggae, rock, rap, drugged up, smoothness. Sounds like some friends of mine.

* House of Large Sizes "My Ass-kicking Life" - My first real taste of a "local" band. Dave and Barb really rocked too.

* The Doors "Riders on the Storm" - Not much to say here, I mean come on, it's the Doors.


Like our favorite yama herder, this list may change like the weather, and could possibly be much longer. So take it as you want. Think about your own list.

Sitting here thinking and stinking.....

I am waiting at school to go to a meeting at 7. It sucks. At least I am getting some things done in my classroom. So, as I sit here working at the computer (getting bored), I have been stinking up my chair. It makes me turn up my nose, and I am just happy no one is around to stop in and smell it. It's quite pungent actually, but it doesn't have any stay power, if you know what I mean.

Now I have to find something to eat. This is a difficult task when you're in a one bar town. I guess it will end up being Gas Station cuisine tonight. This may add to my stank-ass.

Aren't you all glad I decided to start writing again.

Ooooohohohoohoho....I reek, how pathetic.

Lazydrinker

This past weekend my buddies and I witnessed a million dollar idea, the Lazy Drinker. It is quite facinating to see. You have a laptop hooked to a cooler filled with 16 bottles and hoses. The hoses run to a valve assembly and a funnel. On the computer is a softwear program that controls the type of drink and amounts of the various liquids. For example: Screwdriver - hit that button and 2 oz. of vodka pours from the machine, and then 5 oz. of OJ. Just like magic.

The site www.lazydrinker.com doesn't do it justice, but you should check it out anyways.

late.

Guess what I did last night?

I bought a bar! Not a establishment but a piece of "furniture". It is sweet. It has this sweet green vinyl bumper around the top and 4 swivel stools, kind of remenisant of an old soda shop. They too, are covered with a green vinyl pad.

I can't wait to give it a test run in my basement. Now all we need is a foos table...